I was walking the road, my thoughts scattered by what I read on Facebook first thing. I don’t remember what it was that day, but I am obsessed about the drones spooking New Jersey and points nearby. My imagination has gone Hollywood. Is it a foreign adversary sitting off shore sending them in? Are they spraying a biological or chemical agent on New Jersey? Are they our drones doing miliary exercises or looking for a broken arrow? Or are we passively allowing them to spy, like with the Chinese spy balloon?
Governors and mayors have asked the federal government what’s up? And we’re told, “Nothing to see here. We don’t know what they are. But they are not adversaries. Some are manned airplanes and legally flying there.” I have been so alarmed, I have told friends to put together your important papers, some clothes, pet food, pet crates. Gas up your tank.
While I was walking, practicing still prayer, my mind fluttering all over the place, the dogs diving to sniff the roadside, and the sky gray, the words, “The night is far gone, the day is at hand. So then let us cast off the works of darkness and put on the armor of light” (Rom13: 12) welled up. That’s all.
But then, this week I’ve heard from several places how to do this. Vassa Larin is an Orthodox nun who is one of the teachers in the Open Table class on the Letters of Paul. In her essay, “EMBRACING HOPE AMIDST A CULTURE OF “DOOM-SCROLLING” she reminds us that doomscrolling is “an addiction or a ‘deadly hunger,’ it results in us having a crippling picture in our minds of a world (and our own lives) devoid of hope. This vision is not “ortho-dox,” a word that means, among other things, “upright expectation.” Even though I don’t belong to an Orthodox church, I have learned a great deal from their way of walking with the Lord. I too can hold onto those words, “upright expectation.”
This is opposite of keeping our eyes focused on our screens and dread. It means catching those bad thoughts that would distract us, recognizing them, maybe telling the Lord about them, but then letting them go. My first thoughts this morning, took me to a couple women who are no longer my friends. I don’t know why I woke with those thoughts, but there’s no point in hashing over the hurt, circling the loneliness drain and falling in, so I took it as a cue that these ladies needed prayer. I offered my standard, Lord bless them, exchanging that hurt for blessing, so maybe something good could fly into the air toward them and free me from obsessing over breaks I can’t repair. This blessing prayer softens my heart.
In another place, Vassa Larin reminds us that the creed says, “We look to the resurrection of the dead and the life of the world to come.” In other words, upright expectation. This is what we look to: the resurrection, the killing of death by death. We look to the life of the world to come. A pastor once said, if the powers can’t keep you dead, what power do they have over you? They have no control. We are utterly free. We are already citizens of that world to come. And should behave that way, living in the generosity of the Beatitudes.
These are simple words to pull our minds and hearts back from dread. We look to the resurrection of the dead. Death is dead. Death has no sting. Chris Green in one of his Speakeasy Theology Podcasts stated simply that Jesus is our future. Not only is he at hand, but he has gone ahead of us into death. Not only has he pulled Adam and Eve, and Old Testament saints out of the grave, he has come into Hades, the place of the dead. He will meet us there. Finally, we will become the people he had in mind when he created us. And we will likely be salted with cleansing fire, that burns off the impurities and sins and lacks. But even here, now, we can walk toward becoming those people, we can be salted with fire.
It also seems like rejoicing is a way to put on that armor of light. One of the scripture readings for this Third Sunday in Advent is Philippians 4: “Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious for anything but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God” (Phil 4: 4 – 5, ESV). I haven’t seen how it’s joy that goes along with God’s presence, not mucking around in how the world is trashed, how the bad guys seem to win. The natural world shimmers with the same voice that said, “Let there be, and there was and it was good.” We can listen for that voice every time we walk outside. We can look for His handprints.
(I know this is a hard season for many, especially people grieving the loss of beloved or not so beloved people. It can be an intensely lonely time. To you I’d say the Lord draws near to the broken hearted and saves those crushed in spirit. There’s Psalm that says, “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. He determines the number of the stars; he gives all of them their names” (Ps. 147: 3 – 4, ESV). So this Lord who made the stars, that one, heals your broken heart, and binds up your wounds. This I know is true because it has been true for me.
Paul also urges us to think on good things. “Finally brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable; whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable. If there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about those things” (Phil. 4: 8.) We don’t need to focus on the strange drones and our government’s gaslighting. Or take a look at graphic videos or movies depicting violence. Even The Batchelor shows, a favorite guilty pleasure of mine, are not so good. I’m speaking here to myself as much as you because I can get caught in deadly hunger as much as anyone and need to pull my eyes away. Instead of imagining the worse about the abovementioned drones, it might be good to pray for protection, for peace, for our government to be wise as they respond.
So put on the armor of light. Look to the resurrection of the dead and the life of the world to come. Know that the Lord is at hand, right here, right now. Remember we can barely comprehend how deeply and widely we are loved, but that doesn’t stop his loving us.
Also I’d like recommend Sister Vassa’s short reflections. I stop and read them when they come up on my newsfeed and find sound, grounded encouragement. I just subscribed even though my email is already full.
I apologize if this post is not as polished. I was going to beg off for this week, but found I would miss being in touch with you. I had surgery on my eyelids because they were so heavy I felt like sleeping all the time and they blocked my peripheral vision. Also it would be nice to wear mascara again, so I need to get off and cold pack them. As always thank you for reading.
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